Istanbul Gelisim University

Gelisim News

Flirting violence is increasing

Psychiatrist Onur Okan Demirci stating that ‘flirting violence’ is the way that couples engage in physical, sexual, psychological, social and digital violence towards each other, explained: “Social media increases the severity of dating. Technological behaviors such as requesting the password of accounts, forcing to send videos or photos, checking the last time being online, the identity of followers, controlling which photos they liked are examples of flirting violence”.

Violence, which has become a social problem, has profound psychological traces as well as its physical dimension. Psychiatrist Onur Okan Demirci evaluated the severity of flirting problems and its consequences mostly seen in teenagers and young adults. Demirci stating that the behavior of married or unmarried couples in an emotional relationship involving mutual violence or threat is called flirt violence, added: “The use of psychological pressure, follow-up on social media, restricting, forcing sexual intercourse and humiliation are also included in the definition of violence. In fact, these situations can often have more devastating consequences than physical violence.”
 
Demirci expressing that it is necessary to examine the childhood to solve violence, said: “Witnessing physical or psychological violence by one parent to another in childhood, a child may accept the violence-force as powerful figure, and the victom as a weak figure. The child may need to feel strong by applying violence to those who seem a weak figure in later life. Similarly, people who have experienced lack of interest and love, addiction problems in their childhood lives are exposed to violence at a higher level in their lives.”
 
DIGITAL FLIRTING VIOLENCE
 
Faculty member of Istanbul Gelisim University Asst. Prof. Dr. Onur Okan Demirci giving information that trying to control others with technological tools and to establish pressure is defined as "digital dating violence", and drew attention to the increase in this type of violence with the spread of social media. Demirci said: “Technological behaviors such as requesting the password of accounts, forcing to send videos or photos, checking the last time being online, identity of followers, controlling which photos they liked are examples of flirting violence, and needed to pay attention.”
 
THE IDEA OF ‘WHO LOVES IS JEALOUS’ JUSTIFIES THE VIOLENCE
 
Psychiatrist Onur Okan Demirci stated that it is possible to understand that people are prone to violence in relationships and said: “For example, when jealousy cannot be controlled, it can reach very dangerous dimensions. While small levels of jealousy can be met naturally, as the level increases, we call it paranoia. The common belief that ‘who loves is jealous’ cannot go beyond trying to justify the violence of jealousy.
 
ATTENTION TO THE JEALOUSY!
 
Answering the question “Who are jealous?” Demirci said: “People who are afraid of losing are jealous to cope with this fear, those who have inadequate concerns are jealous and those who have difficulty in satisfying their partner physically and emotionally are jealous. None of these situations are included in the definition of love. The dose of jealousy is one of the most important proofs that the relationship will evolve towards violence. Living emotions at extremes can also gain violence”
 
 
 

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